Yesterday while sitting in bed sick, I did a lot of reflecting on the past year. The ups, and the downs. I tried to put myself back in the footsteps of the person I was one year ago today. What were my dreams? What did I wish for the new year? When I look back on this past year, it was not anywhere close to what I thought it would be. Is it ever? A few days ago while grabbing coffee with someone they said how happy they were to have 2014 be over, I nodded my head in agreement. I agreed with her about all the shitty things that happened in 2014 to be over, but I couldn't help but think about all the incredible things that have happened this past year. However, many of these things occurred as a result of those shitty things.
Like everyone I'm excited for 2015, a new year and a new start. But I'm also kind of scared. So much has changed in the last year, and frankly I'm kind of terrified to experience more change. I don't like change. Change has come into my life in some very hard ways. For example, parents getting divorced, which completely changed my view of family and our family dynamic. We have had much progress, and even took a family selfie at our last family holiday supper, but things will never be the same.
This morning while going through every post I wrote in 2014 I was in awe of everything that happened. I decided to write this post of 10 highlights/ things I am grateful for that happened in 2014.
1. Running- I honestly think this keeps me semi sane. The day to day runs, the good and the bad I continue to be extremely grateful for. Also I got a major PR this year sub 2:30 half marathon. And that felt kind of amazing.
2. Friends; the new, the old and everything in between:
New friendships - Please don't hate me if I forgot your photo. There are so many that I am so grateful for and my head cold is affecting my ability to find photos.
But here are some photos of the new friendships I have made. Funny how some of these people have been there for me more than friends I have had for years. I believe friends come in and out of your life. I am grateful to add these people to that list.
Old friendships- these are the friends who have remerged in 2014, whose friendships have grown stronger. I am so grateful for these friends, and look forward to many more fun times in 2015.
Alex- I have known Pink monster my whole life. Since I moved to NYC we have grown very close. She is one of the many people who have taken me under their wing and I am extremely grateful for her.
Janelle- the thing about old friends is sometimes you grow distant for some time. I'm not sure if this ever happened with Janelle, but I can honestly say our friendship has grown and has become stronger this past year. She gets me. I can be the most myself around her, and I'm not judged for that.
And while all of these friendships are incredible and I feel like the luckiest person on the world, there are some friendships that were lost this past year. And that kind of sucks. Like I said I believe friendships come in and out of your life, so hopefully some of those are just on a break for now. Still they are hard to see go. And no, I will not be listing them. That would be cruel and I don't want to reflect on those individual friendships that have hurt me so much to see them go away.
3. Graduating from college. This is a major life moment. I can only explain this day as one filled with excitement and absolute fear. Although I felt sooooo ready to leave, I don't think you can ever really be ready to leave.
4. Kathie Lee and Hoda's fan of the week. Read all about it in the recap :)
5. First real life job...... And then getting laid off. I'm still processing this all, it hurt. While I am so mad at this job, especially after getting laid off in a way I will always find to be cruel, it gave me the push to finally move to NYC. I was in love with this job the previous summer, and then this past summer, it was not the same place and I wasn't the same person. My heart wasn't in it. And as a result it taught me to do something you are passionate about.
6. Theatre. This was a year of theatre. I am so happy it has come back into my life, and I know I want to be apart of it.
7.Falling in love...... with NYC. When people ask me how long I have lived in the city, it's hard to not say a full year. Ever since last January I have come to the city at least once a month.. During the last year I have fallen in love with this city and am happy to now say I live here.
8. Moving to NYC.
9. Running a marathon. This is separate from running. They say running a marathon changes your life. Everyday I believe this a little bit more.
10. Family. The real one and the ones you create for yourself.
Resolutions for 2015? Yes, I am doing them this year.
1. Learning to say no to others and yes to yourself. I put others first, way before myself. I have no idea how to measure this, but I guess I will try to be more conscious of it.
2. A quote I heard recently: "What would you do today if you knew you couldn't fail"
And now for a quote Hoda shared this AM and I believe to be so true. So let's move on with 2015!
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